Jubilee

I'd like to thank you all from the bottom of my heart for praying for my family, and I'd like to introduce you to our "jubilee"- our Shout of Joy to the Lord!

I can't describe the emotion going into this morning- mostly because I couldn't feel much besides an incredible peace wrapped around the Hubs and I as we rested in knowing there were so many praying for our little one.  I truly cannot describe how humbled we are by how many of you have been praying for us and have let us know.  Thank you thank you thank you!

All my heart could utter was a "please please please" as we waited to find our baby on the screen, and almost right away we saw that little heart continuing to thump away! I'm telling you: this is nothing short of a miracle.  My body has been doing exactly what my doctor had warned me was headed towards miscarriage, and after what this pregnancy has looked like this past week, that heart should not have been beating.  But prayer changes things, and as the Hubs said, God must have some big plans for this "tough little buster". =)

One of my dear friends wrote the sweetest note saying she has been in constant prayer for our little one and that the Lord kept laying the term "jubilee" on her heart.  Do you know what "jubilee" means?  Well, lots.  But do you know what my favorite translation is?

Jubilee: Shout for joy

Are you kidding me?!  How incredibly perfect.

And as I dug into the term's history (thank you, Wikipedia) this brought buckets and buckets of tears:

"In the Biblical Book of Leviticus, the Jubilee year is mentioned to occur every fifty years, in which slaves and prisoners would be freed, debts would be forgiven and the mercies of God would be particularly manifest."

Oh, how we have seen His mercy today!

After the ultrasound tech left, I turned to the Hubs and said, "I just can't believe it. We don't deserve to get to keep this little one and there he is, snuggled away, heart beating beautifully.  So many people don't get to see a baby's heart beating on that screen- and there's no good reason why we got to. It's just grace.  That's all there is to it- it's just grace."

Grace.  Given far more than we need.  Heaps and heaps beyond what we deserve.  It's all grace, and we are shouting for joy today!

Remember how I said I go to the Psalms when I run out of words?  Well, I was sobbing through the Psalms last night and guess which Psalm I continued to read over and over and over?

Psalm 100

Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth.
 Worship the LORD with gladness;
   come before him with joyful songs.
 Know that the LORD is God.
   It is he who made us, and we are his;
   we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.

 Enter his gates with thanksgiving
   and his courts with praise;
   give thanks to him and praise his name. For the LORD is good and his love endures forever;
   his faithfulness continues through all generations.

As I sat here and made the connection between "jubilee" and the Psalm I clung to last night as I prayed for our sweet babe? Speechless.

Entering his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise today because the LORD is good. How touched we would be if you would continue to pray for our tough little guy.  This baby is beating the odds, and we would love to have you keep the prayers coming for his health and development.  We know that prayer changes things- that prayer moves the heart of God, and we would be so blessed by your continuing prayers. We want this baby to be our shout for joy for years and years and years. Thank you so much for standing in prayer with us as we root for this little one and continue to trust in God's timing, goodness, and plan, no matter what tomorrow holds.

Thank you, God, for today.

We have been so blessed by you all.  Thank you for getting on your knees and asking for grace- if we could hug each and every one of you, we would! It is my deepest hope that you know Jesus like we do- that you know the Jesus who sits with you in doctor's offices and holds your heart through the good news and the bad- the Jesus who brings together bands of people from across the country to pray for a little life in the womb only 8 weeks old- the Jesus who lavishes grace on us despite all the reasons we don't deserve it.  All is grace, and I pray you know His grace today, deep into the crevices of your heart as we have. 

And because this song encompasses so much of what we're feeling today:

Kleenex and Kazoos

It's a lot easier to blog about pregnancy when its all about the nausea and the Lucky Charms and the cute maternity clothes.  It's just not as easy to blog about pregnancy when its the tough stuff.  But I wanted to write tonight to ask for prayers for our littlest blessing as we go into tomorrow.

For the record, it'd be easier to wait three months and see where we're at and then fill the blog in on where we are and where we've been, but the momma in me can't bear the thought of passing up an opportunity to ask for prayer on my baby's behalf.  So I'm here.  And I'm asking for prayer.  Again. So many of you have been so encouraging and have reached out to say you're pulling for us, that I just couldn't let tomorrow go by without asking for some intercession.

The past few days have been a roller coaster.  Like a grab the box of kleenex and the kazoos because you're gonna be partying and crying and partying and crying kind of roller coaster.   One minute we're sure we've lost him, the next minute I'm all, "Ok, it looks like he might be hanging in there after all!"  To say that we're on our knees in submission is the understatement of the century.  We just have no control and no idea what is going to happen from one hour to the next.  My body's freaking out, but not enough to say its thrown in the towel.  So, on bended knee, we keep hoping and praying and rooting for a miracle.

Then I blow my nose because I cry a lot when I'm on my knees.  Then I eat some ice cream because it really does make me feel better and I'm still pregnant so no one can judge me for the calories.

Now you're wondering when I'm going to get to the point.  =)

We have an ultrasound tomorrow morning at 8.  We're still at a place where this could go either way- towards a healthy pregnancy or towards a loss, and we don't know whether our little one is Home or if he's still snuggling in for the long haul.  I'd love to ask for your prayers.  We would be so, so blessed by your prayers for our littlest kiddo.  We saw his little heart thumping away last week, and we would love to see that again so we know where we're at in all of this. (You know what I'd really love?  I'd love to stop being scared and to be holding a sweet little pink baby in July.)  At this point, the waiting has become an agonizing challenge, and we would love to gain some insight into where we're headed.   There's nothing we want more than to know that despite all the concerns of the past two weeks that our little one is here and well.  We'd be so blessed by your prayers that our little one is well and that this would progress into a healthy pregnancy. We know things could go the other way too, in which we'd still be grateful to know where this road is leading.  It's the waiting that's got me all tied up in knots.

We would so appreciate your prayers tonight and into the morning as we take a look at our little one.  Thank you from the bottom of our hearts to those of you who have said you're praying for our sweet baby and to those of you who will be lifting our little one up in prayer tonight.  We may know you, we may not, but we are so very grateful for your prayers on our behalf, and we love you to pieces for caring about our little baby. Thank you!!!

I've been dwelling in the Psalms this week because that's where I go when my spirit has no words- and if there's one thing that will take your words away, its the constant wondering if you'll get to hold your baby on this side of Heaven.

The Lord gives strength to His people; the Lord blesses His people with peace. Psalm 29:11

We've experience His strength and peace firsthand the past week. I've been so blessed by all of the encouraging words and texts from sweet friends and family.  The hands of Jesus have touched us this week, and we've been renewed in strength and peace with each prayer and text message and voicemail. We feel so wrapped up in the love of Christ.  It's incredible- the kind of peace He brings in the midst of overwhelming obstacles.  Thank you for reminding us that His plans are good and that He loves us more than we can comprehend.  Those truths are a salve to the hurting soul, and I'm so thankful to be surrounded by so many who intercede for us and speak truth to us when the going gets tough.  Thanks for journeying with us here on the blog and in real life when its not all Lucky Charms and trips to the zoo and backyard barbecues and apple orchard hayrides.  You are awesome.

Newbie says hello and that he's got an awesome new upgrade on his box fort involving Christmas lights that he wants to show off the next time his momma pulls out the camera.  He just popped another tooth (7 now- we may not need dentures for him after all!) and he is talking up a storm.  This little guy is my sunshine on these gloomy and unsure days. Every time we pray, he wants to pray for "BAYbee", and I know he's grateful for the prayers for his little brother or sister too.  Thank you so, so much, sweet friends.

Wishing you a week that is blessed, and promising to come back and share when we know more.

Happy Monday!

Celebrating the Bright Spots

Sometimes life is just stinking hard.  When life gets hard, I cry a little, swipe a few hugs from a few of my favorite people, send out a few prayer requests via text message, and then I look around and drink in every single little blessing. Because you know what?  Despite the hard stuff, blessings are everywhere.

There was a whole lotta slurpin' the bottom of the glass yesterday.  Turkey Day delivered a wealth of blessings to be scooped up and savored to the last drop:

(Newbie helped G-Mama make the stuffing)

(And found himself some Cool Whip to eat off the counter...yum!) 

(Turkey Day was spent at G-Mama's and Grandad's with some of our favorite people.  Lots of food, lots of music, and lots of snuggling on Newbie- one of the best ways to spend a day!)

Thank you from the bottom of my heart to so many of you who have been praying for my little family and our sweet baby.  Please keep the prayers coming as we're not sure where this road is headed, and, as many of you know, it's not an easy road to walk.  We're thanking God for our daily bread and taking it one day at a time.  Today was hard- each day is hard, actually- because we're really not sure whether our little one is still with us or not.  We're not sure what tomorrow will bring, but tomorrow has enough trouble of its own, so we're going to snuggle in tonight and give thanks for the bright spots in our day that outshine the unknown.

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.  Matthew 6:33-34

Bright spot #256: Christmas tree gettin' with our little man.

 

Bright spot #257: Curious George attacks the Tupperware cabinet

Bright spot #258: Opie hugs in the morning sunshine

Bright spot #259: Gus Gus belly popping out of the jammies Grandad let Newbie pick out of the bottom of his jammie pile (Looks like Momma could stand to do a little closet overhaul in Newbie's room!)

 

(Thanks for the new jammies, Mutte!  They came just in time today because he's busting out of this Lightening McQueen set!)

I'm giving thanks for the bright spots.  For the joy and sunshine that comes with a healthy baby boy among a trillion other blessings that have landed in my lap.  The uncertainty of tomorrow, and the next day and the next, fade with the gratitude for today. Jesus, give us today.  Give us hearts and eyes to see the daily bread you've provided today, and let our hearts not be troubled as we see your goodness and provision for today- because it is then that we can rest in knowing your goodness and provision will come again tomorrow.

Let's have eyes to see, friends- to see that He is good.

Thanking Him for today, and praying your tomorrow is full of bright spots and blessing.

Happy Weekending!

Loving with Abandon

 I was really hoping to write about this on Christmas this year and post a cute picture that would bring lots of smiles...but I'm learning that my plans aren't always the same ones God has in mind. =)  

And I'm starting to think it makes more sense to share as we celebrate Thanksgiving anyway.  We've got lots to be thankful for this year because.......

I'm pregnant!

(Newbie giving Baby a hug and kiss)

And we are so, so thankful!

We were thrilled to find out we were pregnant with another little bugger after we lost Eden this summer.  We were thrilled to be able to tell Newbie there was another baby in momma's tummy and to watch him snuggle and hug that little something.  

I figured going into this pregnancy that I would be anxious after losing Eden through a miscarriage at ten weeks.  I was right. =) I knew I had two choices:    

1) I could detach myself from this little baby until we were past the first trimester and out of the major danger zone for miscarriage, hopefully saving myself some heartache.

2) I could love this little baby with abandon, delighting in his little self from the moment we found out about him, and praying fervently for him, anticipating getting to meet him someday soon.

I was tempted to go with option one because it sounded easier and a lot less painful if something were to happen, but then I thought about Eden and the nine weeks we had with her and how I wouldn't have traded those sweet days with my girl for anything. So a month ago when we found out we had Baby #3 in the works, I decided to love this little guy with abandon. We pulled out all the stops.  We talk to him each day.  We pray for him.  Newbie snuggles my belly and offers to share his binky with the "BAYbee" each morning. We picked out an ornament for him and have been tossing around name ideas.

The best way this guy has been loved lately? Newbie woke up in our bed a few days ago, pulled my shirt up over my belly, said, "BAYbee!" and leaned in to give my belly a kiss.  So sweet! Then he sat up and folded his hands, which means he wants to pray.  We thanked Jesus for this baby and asked Him to help our baby grow healthy and strong.   Then we said and "Amen" and clapped like Newbie always does.  This baby is a special part of our little family, and we love him to pieces!

(Blurry, but I had to share- he wants to pray for Baby alll the time!)

Everything was progressing well with my pregnancy until this past week. We were waiting to share our news until we were through the high risk time frame for miscarriage, but I'm a strong believer in the power of prayer, so I wanted to share where we're at right now.  I hopped on to share today with a heavy heart because who wants to announce a pregnancy and an urgent prayer request at the same time?!  But a momma's gotta ask for some prayer, right?! =) 

Here's the scoop: Lately I have had some symptoms that concerned my doctor.  She sent me in for some blood work and ordered an ultrasound.  The Hubs and I were nervous about what we'd find on the ultrasound, but were delighted to see a fluttery little heartbeat on the screen yesterday!  (Praise Jesus!) My breath caught in my throat because we didn't get to see our girl until she had already gone and there was no movement on the screen.  We were so blessed to see our little one while his heart was just pounding away!

At this point, we're facing a situation that could go either way in terms of losing our baby or getting to meet him in July.  He's due the week after we lost Eden- July 13, 2012.  It is good news that we saw a healthy baby on the screen yesterday, but I haven't been feeling well which isn't a good sign, and my doctor made it clear that we are not out of the woods on this. We're taking it day by day and waiting on the Lord to show us what is next.  In the meantime, we are continuing to love on this little guy and celebrate that he's here with us now. 

Wait and hope for and expect the Lord; be brave and of good courage and let your heart be stout and enduring. Yes, wait for and hope for and expect the Lord. Psalm 27:14

We are hopeful that as we wait, the Lord will allow us to meet this little baby in July, but we don't expect that of Him because we want to fully submit to His will, and we know that His will may not be that we have a healthy baby next summer.  What we do know is that He is good, and He is faithful. What we do expect is that His plans are bigger and greater than ours and that His plans are good.  We expect that regardless of what happens to our little one that God will never leave us to walk this road alone- be it happy or broken- and that because of His goodness, we will meet this little one someday- maybe on this side of Heaven, maybe not. We expect to see His goodness in whatever happens over the next several days, weeks, and months.

And so, we wait.  We wait with hope.  We wait in courage and confidence of God's good plans.  We endure because He knows more, sees more, and loves more than we do, and we know we can trust the One who has been so faithful to us.

Would you pray with us while we wait?  

We would be so blessed by your prayers for our little baby- that God's will would be done and that if it is His will, this sweet baby would continue to grow strong, and that any signs of loss would be stopped. We're at a crossroad right now that leaves opportunity for this baby to still continue to grow and develop, and prayer changes things.  We're so hopeful that health and life is what the Lord has planned for this one.  And we're confident that we will see His goodness even if He has different plans.  Thank you, friends, so very much for your prayers!

I'll share any progress one way or the other as it comes about.  In the meantime, we wait with hopeful hearts and spirits overflowing with thanks for the opportunity to see our little one yesterday and for each day we have to love on him.  

Another thing we're thankful for this year?
This smile:

And these bright blue eyes:

 

Wishing you all a Thanksgiving full of the richest blessings and joys! 

This song came on the radio while I was writing this post.  Yes, please. =)
*Don't forget to mute or pause the music on the player at the bottom of my blog

Thank You

There's a story in the Bible about ten men. One of our pastors shared this story with us today, and it was one that I was familiar with but had forgotten.  It's from Luke 17: 11-19.  There were ten men. They were sick with leprosy, and Jesus miraculously healed them as they walked by Him.  After being healed, nine of the men just kept walking. Only one of the men turned back, fell at Jesus' feet, thanked Him, and praised God for his healing.

The other nine just walked away.  They never came back. They took the gift they had been given and just kept on going.

The one took the gift, stayed, and couldn't stop thanking Jesus.

I don't want to stop thanking Jesus.  For everything.  Every gift. All the time.

I don't want to be the nine showered in blessing who continue to walk without expressing any gratitude. I want to have eyes to see Him in everything- I want to be aware of each and every gift He's given me, and to thank Him for the gifts.

(image found here)

So tonight, when Newbie was crying at the top of his lungs in his crib after I laid him down for bed, instead of banging my head against the wall and mentally begging that child to JUST GO TO SLEEP, I went into his room, and  I watched his little body calm with my return.  Two arms resting on the edge of the crib, I looked down and whispered that I loved him.  One of his arms clutched his blankie, his binky clicked with each little suck of his tongue, and one little hand reached up from where he lay in his bed and waited.  His tiny palm hung in the air until I offered my hand and his tightened around mine as he brought it close to his chest.  Then his heavy eyes closed.  His grip was firm, his soft face peaceful as he lulled off to sleep.  I stood there, drinking in my boy's sweetness and realizing God was giving me eyes to see- to see the gift. I was exhausted and tired, but nothing was going to keep me from reveling in the blessing that is my son. As I leaned against the crib, holding hands with my sweet baby, I thanked Jesus over and over again for my boy.  Thank you, thank you, thank you for this boy, Lord.  Thank you for his soft hands and his tiny breaths, and his sweet personality.  Thank you for this gift.    Thank you that I have a son who can wail at the top of his lungs, and thank you that my sweet boy has a momma and daddy who love him desperately and who can stand by his crib and hold his hand as he falls asleep. Then my thanks drifted to all manner of gifts.  My heart squeezed with gratefulness for everything.  All things.  Each and every single one.

I want to thank Jesus for everything.  When the Lord pours blessing on us, each of us, I want to be one of the ones who immediately turns to the Lord and says, thank you.

Thank you for food and clothes and the shoes on my feet.

Thank you for a home and a bed and warm blankets.

Thank you for my husband and my son and the joy they bring to my life just by being them.

Thank you for church and community.

Thank you for strangers and new friends.

Thank you for the rivers and trees and wind.

Thank you for cozy socks and hot coffee.

Thank you for health, thank you for family, for babies, for work, for play.

Thank you for giving up Your life so that I may have mine. 

Thank you for the big things and for the little things and for the hard things that make us stronger.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

With every breath I want to thank Him, living a life of gratitude that opens my eyes to the gifts the other nine may overlook.

Thank you for giving me nine weeks with my daughter and 19 months with my son.

Thank you, God, for today.  And thank you for tomorrow.

 Here dies another day, during which I have had eyes, ears, hands, and the great world around me; and with tomorrow begins another.  Why am I allowed two? -G.K.Chesterton

Hoping this Thanksgiving week is full of giving thanks to the Maker of all good things.  Let's be the one in ten, friends, because He is so, so good and worthy of praise.

Come, let us sing for joy to the LORD; let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation. Let us come before him with thanksgiving and extol him with music and song. Pslam 95:1-2 

Still...

Wowzers.  How about I never blog, huh?

If you were expecting an exciting post with lots of pictures, this is surely going to be a disappointment. My apologies!

Because I'm just popping in to say we're still here....and I still haven't hooked up my camera to the sub computer while ours is packed away. Boo!

Sorry for being so MIA on here lately....we're getting settled into my parents' place and slowly recovering from a really busy and crazy few weeks.

We are:

Still on the lookout for a new house.

Still playing mad games of hide and seek with Newbie at least three times a day.

Still laughing every time Newbie says, "tar tar" instead of "guitar".

And still wishing I had bought Lucky Charms instead of Multi Grain Cheerios last week at the grocery store.

I'll be back this week with some pictures and video if I can get Newbie to show off a little bit for the camera. =)

Happy Sunday!

Love, your sleep deprived mother

Dear Newbie,

Remember how we just moved a trillion boxes out of our old house and into various other locations all within the past 72 hours?

Me too.

So please, please, PLEASE, pretty please with sugar and sprinkles and a cherry on top take a nap.

Because Momma needs one too.

Please?

Love,

Your Mother...who is currently wasting away in a sleep deprived stupor while I watch you chat with the friends in your crib.  Wait-what was that?  Newbie, I think Dog and Country Bunny and even Blankie all just said, "Please stop talking to us; its time to take a nap."  Maybe we should just do what they say.  Maybe????

Two Goodbyes

What makes a week of moving even crazier?  When your MIL and FIL are moving from their house to a new house in the same week!

My MIL and FIL sold their house a while before the Hubs and I sold our own, but the way the cookie crumbled has us all scrambling to pack up and haul out during the same time frame.

Welcome to Crazy Town.

What it boils down to is a couple of really crazy weeks and two house-related goodbyes in the same stretch of seven days.

Tonight the Hubs and I took Newbie over to Grandpa and Grandma's for our last hoorah.  We have a slew of memories built up in the walls of that house, and while the Hubs has a billion more before I came along, I have several of my own.

My MIL and FIL's Country House is where the Hubs and I first met.  It was a (nice, chaperoned, and crazy-free) after prom party our senior year of high school with several of our mutual friends.  He was a looker and a charmer and left me wishin' and hopin' he'd call me after I went home.  (He did. But it was two weeks later.  Worth the wait.  But I'm just saying.)

Our favorite date was at the Country House.  We started there and then the Hubs took me all through town on a four-wheeler.  I didn't even know what a quad was until I met that guy, but I loved blazing through the tall grass and thick trees with my arms wrapped around his waist.  Favorite date by far for both of us in those first years. Hard to believe that was seven years ago now. 

My in-laws have always had a hot tub, and we have always smelled like chlorine when we leave their house.  (Well, in the early years before I got pregnant with Newbie and had to sit out for fear of hard-boiling my baby, and now I still sit out with a little guy who is too small to roast in the hot tub). We spent several nights under the stars hanging out in the hot tub and solving all the world's problems- procrastinating on college papers and just chilling out in the HT instead. 

Another smell I'll forever associate with the Country House is the husky scent of burning logs in a wooden stove.  Yum. One time when we were dating, I was the lucky girl who got to help the menfolk drop logs down the shoot from outside into the basement where the wood stove was.  We stacked the logs against a wall in the storage section of the basement, and I had never felt more domesticated.  If the Hubs and I ever have to rough it in a log cabin with only a fire to warm us and our littles, worry not- homegirl has it covered.

The Hubs dropped the three worded bomb on me in the basement of the Country House.  I'll never forget where I was sitting when he whispered, "I love you."  The sweet aroma of chlorine (again!) filled the air and we were hanging out in the basement after an evening of swimming before we went home for the night, and he said it.  I couldn't believe he did, because I had told him to keep that to yourself unless you are sure you mean it, mister.  And he did.  He had waited for a long time, and he meant it and he said it, and I almost tromped down to the basement tonight to take a picture of the very spot that started forever. Then I realized the photograph would never do justice to the sweet picture I have imprinted in my mind.  So I didn't try because some things have to be left as memories- they taste better that way. 

The Country House hosted Easter this past year.  It was so fun watching my little man all decked out in his Easter plaid with matching tie and hat toddle all over that big front yard.  He had a ball rolling in that fresh green grass with Mimzy the pug.  We had a big Easter egg hunt that sent us running across all lengths of that yard for some killer-good eggs full of green bills and candy.  Such fun!

Speaking of the holidays...Oh my Christmas.  My mother-in-law throws a Christmas gathering like nobody's business.  When I think of Christmas at the Country House, I think of snuggly jammies that we usually wore, regardless of the time of day we came over.  I think of a BEAUTIFUL tree trimmed with red and silver and glittering with fluffy white snow that never melts.  (My MIL is a tree decorating extrodinaire.) I think of oodles of boxes wrapped to match with bows and tags tucked under the tree.  Of smells coming from the kitchen that could mean nothing but YUM.  And lots and lots of smiles.  Because my MIL and FIL know how to play Santa well, and because there's no place like home for the holidays, folks.

We've shared many a dinner over the small round table at the Country House.  The MIL and FIL are incredibly hospitable, and I have always loved the vast array of cheese and crackers that always sit out on the counter to curb any grumbling tummies before dinner is ready.  One time when we were dating, the Hubs and my FIL conspired to get me to eat some sort of pheasant-turkey-goose they had recently shot out in a real field somewhere.  We are talking fresh out of the woods, my friends.  Nothing testified to the authentic nature of that meal more than the BULLET I crunched down on while I was chewing my third or fourth bite.  WHAT the WHAT?!  I was munching away thinking, "this whole hunting thing isn't so bad because this food is actually delicious" when my teeth grounded down on what could have only been something trying to kill me.  Or at least turn me off of pheasant-turkey-goose for life.  I pulled the perpetrator out of my mouth, and I kid you not when I say it was a REAL LIVE bullet. As in a round sphere the color of steel stinking hanging out on my dinner plate.  Apparently it was a relatively normal thing for hunters to experience at the dinner table, because they both just chuckled at my reaction. As much as I have enjoyed sharing dinner at the Country House, I can honestly say I will never eat a pheasant-turkey-goose thing again.  Amen.

But I will eat regular turkey.  I'll never forget the Thanksgiving when I was pregnant with Newbie.  My MIL was hosting Thanksgiving at her house that year, and the spread she was rocking on that dining room table was a sight for a sore pregnant woman's eyes.  I don't know that I've ever eaten more in my life.  It. was. amazing.  Also, her Yorkshire pudding?  Put a fork in me, I'm done.

Of course, its not all about the bullets and the food.  There was the big pool in the summertime where we swam and swam and swam each year.  And the woods where we walked Opie every once in a while and where the Hubs and I went exploring.  There was the deer stand that I sat in with the Hubs a good four hours one opening day when we were dating and I was still trying to get him to like me enough to marry me.  Four hours in, the cold and the mice had me making a beeline back to the house- proposal or not, nothing was worth sitting out in the tundra listening to mice scurry over your head in a deer stand! There were the grandparents' houses that sit not-too-far away, making for fun visits when we came out to the country.  There was the garage door with dents in it from the time the Hubs' brother locked him out of the house and he tried to bang the door down with a sledge hammer.  (I always thought that was the funniest story because the Hubs is one of the most even-keeled guys I know, and it tickles me to think of him getting mad enough to whack a door with a hammer several times.) And there was, be still my heart, the fireflies and the spring peepers that kept the Hubs and I company when we hauled a couple lawn chairs out to the backyard to watch the stars while we were dating.  We had a thing for stars.  Its what we did to end many a fun day together back when we were falling in love. The spring peepers filled the night air with their happy song, and the fireflies danced in the field in front of us.  Sitting there in that backyard that night is one of my fondest memories of my time at the Country House. 

So many good memories all built up in one place.  I scooped them up and stuck them in a bottle tonight before we drove away so the Hubs and I could keep them forever.  We're looking forward to seeing what my MIL and FIL make of their new place, and we're excited to start building some new memories there with our family in tow!

With all the house goodbyes this week, we are feeling a mess of stress and emotion (mostly me in the emotion arena!) and happy anticipation of what is to come.

We sign the papers at nine tomorrow morning.

New adventure?  Bring it.

A Sunday Sundae

Just popping in to say that the Old House is almost entirely empty.  YES MA'AM it is.  My MIL and FIL and my daddy and my man all got for real on that house today, and within two loads had everything but the basement and garage all packed up, hauled out, and tucked away in storage.  EVERYTHING. A HUGE thank you to our family for pitching in BIG time today to get 'er done! 

We'll be back to finish up the basement and garage then its adios to the Old House for good.   

In other news, today is my Uncle R's birthday! Uncle R is my mom's brother and is the kind of uncle a kid dreams of having.  He was a bucket of fun growing up- always taking painstaking effort to apply all of the Barbie stickers on Santa's latest loot or to put together our birthday toys.  And he put up with Corndog and I begging him to play every hour of every day we were ever together ever. He is the best, man. He lives a bit of a drive away, but we're going to see him this Christmas and can't wait!  If I could bottle up all the enthusiasm that comes with a "happy birthday" rendition by the local Applebee's waiters complete with complimentary birthday sundae I would, but I can't, so I'm settling for the next best thing: Newbie in a birthday box.

 

 Wishing you all fabulous start to the week tomorrow and a relaxing Sunday evening!

Home Away from Home

We're here.  At our home away from home.

And all I can say is: G-Mama can cook a mean chicken and veggie dinner. Moving in with my parents for the next several weeks might be the best decision we've ever made.

Yesterday may have been the last morning we spent like this:

(This pic was taken a few weeks ago- but its definitely a "day in the life" pic from our old house.)

But this morning started with Grandad's famous cinnamon toast and ended with a few helping hands to get dinner picked up while a few more hands helped with bathtime upstairs.  It takes a village, people, and this ain't a bad gig. =)

Last night my parents watched Newbie overnight while the Hubs and I hit the upstairs at the Old House like it was our last stand.  We spent three hours packing and hauling and packing, and by the time we were done and had loaded everything we were going to take to my parents' in the back of the moving truck, it was 11 o'clock at night.  

Usually by 11 we are watching re-runs on Hulu.com or snoozing.

But not last night, baby.

Since we had babysitters and had spent our "date night" working, we decided to take advantage of the break from being responsible adults. We up and drove that massive moving truck to the grocery store for donuts and Poptarts because WHY NOT.  We parked that huge sucker right in the middle of two parking spots and waltzed into that bakery like a coupl'a crazy kids.  It was awesome.  We blared Christmas music through the speakers on the way home, cramming donuts into our cake holes and then hit a sugar crash when we walked in the door and went to bed.  But we lived hard for that half hour, baby.  

I'm so grateful for the blessed changes that come with marriage and having a little family of our own, but I love me a good night out on the town with my man, a moving truck, and a few donuts.  AMEN.

(Random chubby baby picture circa fall 2010 compliments of Why Not? ...I'm a wild woman- I ate donuts in a moving truck at midnight, and here I am posting pictures that are completely contextually irrelevant.  What's next?!)

 

(Eek!  Here I go again! It's hard not to post adorable baby pictures when I'm drowning in an ocean of sentiment and moving upheaval.  I'm blaming the sleep deprivation due to our late night excursion to the grocery store and the incredible collection of pictures I have stored up on my database.)

 

(How do you not post this???  Last one. I promise.)

This morning we unloaded our loot at G-Mama's and Grandad's.  We had a lot of loot.  Mainly because I'm not sure if we'll be here for two weeks or a few months, but also because I've never been a light packer and what if I need a few extra pairs of shoes or blankets?  I mean, can you ever have too many blankets?  

My parents have been the picture of grace and hospitality, smiling the entire time we carted billions of boxes in the door and up the stairs.  My mom did a Goodwill closet overhaul to clear out room for us, and before dinner tonight, I had unloaded most of the boxes and really made it feel like home.  Which is not hard to do since our home hasn't felt like home in two weeks due to the excess amount of boxes and moving paraphernalia (don't give me credit for knowing how to spell that word, because before the spell check it said: "paraphanelia"...nobody wonders how I ended up with an English degree more than me, I can promise you that.)

Tomorrow is a big day.  Boxes to the warehouse for storage and if we get real crazy, furniture too.  I hate to say there is still a storage closet, a basement, and a garage to pack up and haul out, but there totally is.  We are going to go hard the next three days and somehow make it happen.  Yikes.

Regardless of the big to-do list ahead of us, and the craziness behind us, I'm feeling so grateful for this opportunity.  I'm thinking of where we were at this time last year when we had a round little baby boy and only dreamed of being able to sell our house and move a little closer to family, a little further from the city.

(My roly poly boy with his aunt Courtney last November.)

What an incredible blessing the past few weeks of house-selling mania have been.  I'm so excited to be stepping into this new adventure.

The Hubs and I know this transition time between houses is just a season, and we are going to savor every moment of the good company and extra help before we pack up and move into our new home.  We're still on the hunt and are confident in God's timing for our new place.  In the meantime, we're going to enjoy some cinnamon toast and chicken dinners. =)

Wishing you all a blessed Sunday!

 

(How fun is this picture of Newbie and Griffin I found??? They are still best buds...Newbie has been exclaiming "Giff'n!  Giff'n!" any time he sees Griffin come into the room. Though Opie is still his favorite- evidenced by the happy dance he does every morning when he comes downstairs and sees his puppy dog.)

PS- New pictures to come when I get my external hard drive set up with my mom's computer.  That's a tall order for a computer illiterate like myself, but I'll get it up and running as soon as I can. =)

This Old House

Warning: Sentimental and way-too-long post ahead.  Read on at the risk of losing 10 minutes of your life you'll never get back....or just fast forward to the pictures. I had to take some time to write this stuff down so I don't forget. =)

Tonight is the last night we'll spend in this old house (it was built in 1911 and turned 100 years this year!).  Because of the way it looks like the cookie is going to crumble over the next few days, the Hubs and I are thinking it makes the most sense to pack up our every day items and move in with my parents tomorrow.  Sunday we're hauling out boxes.  Tuesday we're signing papers, moving furniture, and bidding our very last farewells.

Maybe that's why I squeezed a couple Christmas CD's into the grocery budget when Newbie and I were out yesterday.  I'm feeling a little sentimental.  It hit me yesterday afternoon when Newbie got up from his nap and we sat at his big bay window watching the first snowfall powder the ground with big, fat fluffy flakes that this would be the last time.  The last time I would watch snow fall from the big white window in his room on the quiet rooftops and streets outside.

My breath caught a little in my throat.  This house has been good to us.  This home has been good to us.

All day some of my favorite memories here have been floating through my head...

The first time the Hubs and I came here after he got the house.  We were in collage, dating, and had run to the grocery store to buy the SpongeBob Life board game (a very mature choice, right?).  We came in the back door, just the two of us and spread out the game on the open floor in the dining room.  We sat there playing Life and talking about all the fun we would have in the house.  The Hubs was dreaming up bachelor pad ideas (surely involving video games and loud drums) while I thought of what I would do with the place when it was my turn to move in (curtains, paint, babies). It was such a good night.

We hung out here a lot while we were dating.

He had various roommates, but my favorite times were when his brother and Mr. E were living here with him.  They were just good guys and fun to be around.  Also, one of his other roommates burned through the Christmas stove cover I had given the Hubs from the Dollar Store, so he was instantly removed from the Good Roomie list.

A month before we got married, I kicked all his roommates out and started moving all the fun stuff in.  Our shower gifts, the queen size bed, the curtains.  It was such an exciting time.  A week before our wedding, the Hubs moved out and I moved in with my sister and my bestie from Texas and we hung out for the week.  I was sure to have the place geeked out with Christmas decorations in time for my bachelorette party, which we celebrated here.  Such fun times.  At one point we got a little cold and a little freaked out and finally moved out of the place the last couple nights before my wedding because I wasn't a big fan of staying in the house without a burley man around.  I'm still not. =)

(image created by http://www.trudyholtzphotography.com)

Two days after our wedding, we spent our first Christmas Eve here together.  We were unwrapping gifts after the Christmas Eve service and our neighbor knocked on the door.  He invited us over for a bonfire and a beer in his backyard.  I think he thought a bachelor and his roomies still lived here.  We passed under the explanation that we had just gotten married and this was our first Christmas together and we're actually opening presents right now, man.  When we went to bed that night, the guy's fire was blazing bright in the cold outside our window.

The semester following our wedding I began my student teaching.  I did a lot of lesson planning and stressing out under this roof.  The Hubs was always great about a good frozen pizza on those busy days and nights.  He's such a good sport.

We brought Opie home the following summer.  He was as small as my foot and the most adorable thing.  We snuggled him and he pranced around the living room.  He was so low to the ground, we could never figure out if he was just chilling out or boycotting his potty training program.  Apologies to the buyers....Stanley Steamer is probably not a bad idea before you get to cozy around here.  We're over due on our carpet cleaning this year.  Just keepin' it real, folks.

I'll miss the radiators that I hate so much.  They are hard and huge and dusty on the inside, but I love the cozy vibe they put off at Christmastime and the way Opie lays in front of them through the winter.

Our second winter here we made an ice skating rink in the backyard.  It involved a huge plastic paint drop cloth, an embarrassing taping and cutting endeavor in the middle of the Home Depot, and a ridiculous water bill.  But we did get to skate on it.  Once.  It was rockin'.

The windows.  Oh, the windows.  Every single window in this house is sparkly and new thanks to a generous gift from my in-laws.  I wish I could pack them all up in a box and take them with me.  Especially our three HUGE bay windows.  I'm mourning the thought of not having bay windows wherever we end up.  I love me some bay windows.

 

In the summertime we walked to Dairy Queen.  Heaven help me, what a dream.  I hope our next house is near some kind of frozen treat establishment. We also spent our summers watching people come and go outside.  Its been fun to be in a packed neighborhood where there's always some people watching to be had.  Newbie and I watched lots of people come and go yesterday afternoon while we admired the snow from his window.  However, I'm keeping my fingers crossed that our next neighborhood just might have less people and more deer.  I could go for some country livin'.

When I was pregnant, I spent many a day walking in the backdoor and praying my huge self didn't go tumbling down the basement stairs.  The stairs are open and literally directly to the left of the backdoor.  I call it the death trap.  A little morbid, sure.  But I came up with it to keep the threat of imminent danger always at the forefront of the Hubs' mind when he comes in and out the backdoor.  You can never be to careful around those steps.  I will be so happy to say "see ya suckas!" to that flight of stairs.

We brought Newbie home to this house.  We brought his little carseat in the back door, (past the death trap) and settled into the living room.  At the time, the house was overflowing with all kinds of baby stuff.  It was everywhere.  The dining room was gushing with gifts, the kitchen over flowing with bottles and pump supplies and the living room coffee table was cluttered with feeding notes and hospital numbers to call, and binkies.  I loved those days.  Sure, I was a crazy, anxious mess, but those were sweet times in this house with that little baby boy.

The Hubs and I stumbled through the hallway upstairs in the dark.  A diaper, a rocker, a swaddling blanket.  We were always looking for something or carrying something or changing something.  What a crazy, crazy time.  Sleepless nights, sleepless days.  No wonder I was completely off my rocker.  But again, such precious memories of caring for our sweet baby here.

Then Newbie started to roll.  By Christmastime he was scootching to wherever he wanted to go.  The Christmas tree was his favorite, and I learned quickly that I couldn't leave that little pea anywhere if I wanted to keep him away from the tree.  He also loved the decorations.  I go all out around here every year.  Garland in the doorways, lights and holly up the banister in the stairwell, snowflakes hanging from the chandelier.  I'm going to miss decking the halls here this year.  But you can bet I'm hauling my favorites to my mom's to pull out and set around our two rooms in her house this Christmas.  And she's blessing me with the task of decorating her house this year.  Can't wait!

Newbie played in his first snow in the front yard of this old house.  He loved it.

We celebrated Newbie's first birthday here in all kinds of circus style.

 

 He started officially walking long distances the day of his party.  He walked through the living room, then the playroom.  I'm so thankful our other kiddos will be going home to our next house so I can capture some of those milestones in our new home.  It is so fun to picture the place where all those things happened.  With Newbie, I'm bottling up the memories and carrying them with me- probably in a weepy sobby mess when we officially lock the door and leave Tuesday.

Are you ready for this?  I'm going to miss our squirrels.  Dang it.  I never thought I'd say it, but Newbie has taken to watching them from his window and talking to them in the morning.  And doggone it all, if he hasn't met a few buddies who come all the way up to the window screen to chat.  They get so close and then start munching away on maple seeds.  I'm going to miss those little rascals if for nothing more than the entertainment and amazement they provide for Newbie.  Chet, you done good.  I'm just glad I don't have to wake up to the sound of you gnawing your way through who knows what in the attic each morning.  Keep going, buddy.  I'm sure you'll break through the walls one of these days, and oh, what a day that will be.

Tearful goodbyes will be said to the curtains in the dining room and Newbie's nursery.  To the sillouette of a tree I painted on Newbie's wall when I was 8 months pregnant.

To the fancy tile and white vanity and awesome bathtub in our remodeled bathroom upstairs.  To the mudroom because a mudroom is a luxury we have not seen in the other houses we are looking at.  To the screened in porch/three seasons room because there has never been a better place to blow bubbles or play at a water table in on a rainy day.  To the backyard where we grilled out so often and Newbie splashed in his pool.

 To the kitchen island my in-laws gave me for Christmas a few years ago.

To the plastic teal and purple carpet I hate upstairs and the spot where the Hubs dropped a dobble of grape jelly that is still sticky and the quarter size spot of melted carpet where I set the iron when it was too hot.  To the new fluffy carpet we put in up in the hallway and Newbie's room. Oh, the blessing of new carpet!  To the tulips that bloomed each spring in the flowerbeds.

 

To the hours playing on the floor in the playroom or the nursery in our jammies.

I'm so grateful that we can take our selves and our earthly treasures and memories along with us when we go and that we are moving on to another new adventure. But a little piece of my heart will squeeze at leaving the place where we've made so many memories in the early chapters of our lives.

I'm so grateful for all the ways God has provided for us in this house.  However, there are some things I will not be sad to see go.  I will tear up with gratefulness and heartache for the bits and pieces of this place that I love.  But then.  THEN I will salute, and exclaim, "It's been real, man.  Hope I see you again never!" to: the mice and their poo.  The steel, super shady front screen door.  The locks that don't unlock from the outside on the front door.  The driveway.  The garage.  The basement and all its creepiness.  The uneven floors.  The dust underneath the furnaces that I can never vaccuum up.  The death trap stairs.  The drop-off cliff at the top of our upstairs steps.  The questionable stench when the weather warms up and the rain falls in the springtime.  The bats.  The random knocks at the door at 2 o'clock in the morning.  The stray dogs wandering through our backyard.  The lack of a fence.  And last but not least, our neighbor's dogs.  Good riddance, you yapping nap ruiners!

We've been blessed with some good neighbors, but we don't know them very well.  Several of the houses around us are rented out and people come and go every few months.  Most work throughout the day, and there aren't many kids.  We've had a hard time finding our niche in the neighborhood, and we're looking forward to putting down roots somewhere and being intentional about getting to know our neighbors more on Round Two than we did this time. 

That being said, I think we're ready to go.  I know we're ready to go.  I'll be weepy when we leave, probably, but mostly because of the memories we made here and my desperate attempt to carry them with us as we go.  Also because of that white trim and those bay windows.  *sigh*

Lord willing, Tuesday we'll sign the papers, come back to the house and move out what's left after our big haul on Sunday, and then we'll wave goodbye and step into the next new adventure.  I'm ready for a new adventure.  And I'm so grateful to have my two boys at my side while we turn to the next chapter.

Fare thee well, Old House, thanks for all the memories. And happy 100th Birthday!

 

(Oh yes,my little mountain goat was in so much trouble for this!)

PS- Entirely unrelated, but while I was digging through old pictures I found this.

 First of all, you can tell I was pregnant with Newbie and didn't have any kids yet because check out that hair.  I can't remember the last time I had time to curl my hair.  Second, this totally happened two years ago on opening night- matching candy and all.  And I can't promise it won't happen again next week. I can't explain why I watch these movies.  It just happens.

Frozen Pizza is Dead to Me

I'm still here.  I'm just crammed in between a bin of picture frames and potholders and a few boxes of stuffed animals. 

Our official closing day is Tuesday.  One week from today.  I cannot tell you how happy and grateful we will be to sign papers that day! 

My brain is a mish mash of all kinds of stuff right now, so I'm not going to attempt anything beyond a list this afternoon.  Ready?

1) Newbie had his first bowl of Lucky Charms this morning. I gave in after listening to him beg for "more" of mine each day last week.  He loved it.  Is anyone surprised?  The apple did not fall far from the tree, folks.

2) Opie knows we're leaving.  The boxes are freaking him out.  He has rebelled against the idea in various ways (I will spare you the smelly details) despite my attempts to explain that our next house will have a fence/dog run that will change his life for the better.

3) It looks like a bomb went off in my bedroom.  Clothes and boxes and puzzle pieces(???) everywhere.  Help.

4) I don't know if I can gag down another variation of frozen pizza.   I cannot wait until we move in with my parents and have a fully stocked kitchen again. Amen.

5) I had big hopes and dreams of doing a "thankful theme" throughout November on the blog, blogging each day about something I was thankful for.  But then we got an offer on our house and boxes exploded everywhere and I forgot what my name was.

6) Who is going to change the stink bomb that just dropped across the room? 

7) When is Newbie going to stop trying to scale the mountain of boxes in the living room?  I walked in on him one box high and three boxes deep this afternoon after sneaking off to the kitchen to grab a handful of Goldfish crackers.  That man works fast.

8) Can we come over for dinner?  I was serious about the frozen pizza thing. 

I have to go switch out some laundry and play tag with my little.  The fun of playing tag and hide 'n seek in a house full of boxes is amplified to the infinite degree.  Embrace the chaos, baby. 

Happy Tuesday!!!

Box Town... Population: 3

Hello from Box Town.  Land of the microwaved dinners and paper plates.  Home to 25 boxes and counting. We have packed up the entire first floor of our house, including the kitchen, which when packing, is the room that must not be named.  Putting my entire kitchen into cardboard boxes was a task fit for Jack Bauer himself.  It was brutal.  But we triumphed!  Then we went to the grocery store to buy all kinds of horrendous frozen microwavable food because we packed every plate, pot, and spatula in this joint.

The Hubs and I are beaming with joy tonight because it was a job well done today following much trepidation on my part about what it would look like to actually get this bad dad whipped into shape by our move-out date.  One floor down, two to go.  Now that the kitchen is behind us, the closets are stepping up to the plate as the most feared.  Good NIGHT how did we manage to cram so much stuff into those things in the past four years???  We'll be closet diving tomorrow- wish me luck!

Newbie took off for the day with Grandad, but he has been loving his current Box Town residence.

He also loved the ocean of leaves he helped rake up this evening.  He was thrilled to have a rake just his size and went to TOWN on the leaves under a canopy of gold tonight.  It was so fun to watch him get in there and mix it up with his little brown boots on.  When did he stop being a baby and start being such a little boy? I was happy to have a few moments to savor autumn and my boys in the midst of the craziness that has blown through here since we got the offer on our house. Ate. it. up.

 

Do you know who else ate this week?  Woody.  Newbie has really taken to this Toy Story character this week, and wanted Woody to sit down and watch Elmo in Newbie's chair.  Then he started sharing his coveted cream cheese covered crackers with Woody.  What?!  Too cute.

Newbie's got (another?!) stuffy nose and was in bed with us alllll night last night.  That kid flips and flops more than a fish outta water when he sleeps in our bed.  Feet in the face. Back on the pillow. Head butting my nose like some kind of mountain ram.  He does it all.  Its like sleeping with a buffalo.  No joke.  So needless to say we didn't get a lot of sleep last night, and since we've got big plans to start (and possibly finish) packing the second floor tomorrow, its an early bedtime for us tonight.

I hope you all have a very happy Sunday and find some time to cram some green beans into your ear this weekend.  Because why not?  Nothing seizes the day like jamming a few beans in your ear at dinner time.  Carpe diem, baby.